The more we adopt Iq’bal as a value, the more we will be working with others to understand them, resolve our differences with them, and uncover new points of common understanding. This growing familiarity which and working with others will increase our appreciation of who they are, what they stand for, and what can be expected of them. We will also become more attuned to how they will react, and how best to work with them in an effective relationship. This enhanced awareness or intense appreciation is what we term Love. We are referring to the kind of “love” that exists among members of highly effective and productive teams. It is a love born of extreme knowledge and appreciation of others, and the belief that we can trust and rely on them.
This love, when it exists, means we have practiced effective dialogue and have been able to bridge the differences between ourselves to create a new and more powerful paradigm from which to work.
Love is based on intimate familiarity. Our contact with people, however, is often brief or in very specific situations (e.g., on a project, or a limited assignment). Thus, when we reached the stage of “Love” with someone, we most probably reached this stage based on a limited and specific situation. For example, having worked with and gotten to know someone while both of us were part of a specific project exposes me to the traits of that person as a colleague or peer. Then, when we go through the “External 4” process of Ihsan Al-Than, from Qabool to Iq’bal to love, we go through it on the basis of being peers, and all that develops from this process develops on this basis. However, if we work on another project in which one is the supervisor of the other, then we will not be sure of what behaviors and opinions to expect from each other. We will not know what effect the manager – subordinate relationship will have on the dialogue we previously developed. This means the process of dialogue is now disrupted. Hence, to rebuild it we will have to restart the “External 4” process based on this new relationship.